i want those two hours of my life back.

i just made homemade samoas.

HUGELY DISAPPOINTING.

the cookie part was absolutely disgusting, i didn't have enough chocolate to drizzle over all of them, and i'm just ticked off beyond belief.

what a let-down.

it took me two hours to bake and assemble them and i can't even think about eating any of them [which is probably a good thing].

i wish i had waited until i got home to try them. my mom always knows how to fix things.

oh well! at least i tried, right?

food, glorious food!

i've been obsessed with food blogs lately.

actually, i've mostly just been obsessed with smitten kitchen.

beautiful photographs, delicious and simple food, and great writing make this blog a good read.

i plan on cooking a lot while i'm home for spring break.

in fact, i just might give my mom a break and cook the whole week i'm home!

here are some recipes from smitten kitchen that i'm dying to try:

-baked spinach

-spring panzanella

-peanut sesame noodles

-ratatouille

-huevos rancheros

-chana masala

-lime yogurt cake with blackberry sauce

-arroz con leche

don't all of those dishes look mouthwatering??

i'm just itching to cook right now!

do you have any favorite food blogs i should know about?

or any foolproof recipes you'd like to share?

ps: i'm DYING to make these!

i missed girl scout cookies this year [AGAIN], and have been craving samoas [and thin mints] for a long, long time.

i don't think i can wait until spring break to attempt these.

happy weekend!

in honor of the weekend, enjoy this fun/awesome video!

i would have all of you know that i do this almost every morning to pump myself up [although i'm usually listening to beyonce and i've never recorded myself doing it].

it WORKS.

this too shall pass.

we watched this today in my 20th century art history class and for some reason, it made my eyes well up with tears.

we're just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl year after year.

right now i have more half-written posts than i know what to do with, but all i can think about is the following excerpt from a book i read for a class:

"All things change according to the state we are in. Nothing is fixed. I lived once in the top of a house, in a little room, in Paris. I was a student. My place was a romance. It was a mansard room and it had a small square window that looked out over housetops, pink chimney pots. I could see l'Institut, the Pantheon, and the Tour Saint Jacques. The tiles of the floor were red and some of them were broken and got out of place. There was a little stove, a wash basin, a pitcher, piles of my studies. Some hung on the wall, others accumulated dust on their backs. My bed was a cot. It was a wonderful place. I cooked two meals and ate dinner outside. I used to keep the camembert out of the window on the mansard roof between meals, and I made fine coffee, and made much of eggs and macaroni. I studied and thought, made compositions, wrote letters home full of hope of some day being an artist.

It was wonderful. But days came when hopes looked black and my art student's paradise was turned into a dirty little room with broken tiles, ashes fell from the stove, it was all hopelessly poor, I was tired of camembert and eggs and macaroni, and there wasn't a shade of significance in those delicate little chimney pots, or the Pantheon, the Institut, or even the Tour Saint Jacques."

--Robert Henri, The Art Spirit--

i relate to this a lot.

sometimes when i'm walking around rexburg or sitting in class or listening to music in my room, i feel like i'm in my own little student's paradise.

but days come when my paradise turns into nothing but a swamp. rexburg is magically unveiled to be a dinky little town, my classes are suddenly full of pious people, and my apartment stays clean for maybe an hour tops.

but i feel like, after my time here is done, i'll remember more of the paradise and less of the swamp.

i want to remember the late-night ramirez runs,

the shows every weekend,

how every time i go to the library something funny happens,

bike rides to walmart in the warm summer evenings,

and

having true friends who know and understand me.

at least, i hope that's what happens after graduation.

let's hit the road, friend of mine.

sometimes when i'm walking around rexburg i play yann tiersen [specifically the song posted above], close my eyes, and pretend i'm in paris.

and sometimes it feels so real i can almost smell fresh baguettes and cigarette smoke [and whatever else paris smells like] and hear the car horns and beautiful, lilting conversations in francais.

i need to get out of this country.

it's been a while.

so, it's been a little over two weeks since i've posted.

since my last post i have...

seen many many movies

gone to lots and lots of shows

registered for my very last semester at byu-idaho

been hassled by an idiot at a show

sung at karaoke a few times

attended the most awkward fhe of my life [more on that later]

taken a couple of tests

acquired a new obsession: food blogs [specifically this one]

experienced the first rain of the year [SPRING!]

spent way too much time daydreaming about summer

watched the second and third lord of the rings movies... and actually enjoyed myself

walked all over rexburg

listened to the classic indie pandora station every day [great homework music!]

been duped by byuidaho [again]

dreamed of disneyland [only 5ish more months!]

AND

started thinking of research paper topics for my senior paper.

it's been a busy two weeks.

but only four more weeks until this semester is over!

HOORAY!

day 30: my favorite song at this time last year

[can you believe it's day thirty already?? i just have to say, i loved this thirtydaychallenge! it was so fun and i actually learned a little more about myself. thanks for reading.]

----------

last year i downloaded a music sampler from amazon.

usually, when i download one of those, i listen to one song once and forget about the rest.

this song was the only one i listened to.

but after i listened to it once, i listened to it again.

and again.

and again.

it got to the point where i had to ration how many times i listened to it because i didn't want to get sick of it.

i still love it to this day.

the hymnlike harmonies in the chorus hook me every single time.

what a great song to end this challenge on!

day 29: a song from my childhood

[this video is deliciously 90s.]

back when we lived in maryland, i had a bus driver who listened to an r&b station.

i remember hearing this song, some tlc, and kriss kross on that station and i think that's why i love hip hop and r&b so much now.

anyway.

we had a boyz ii men tape at the time and i would rollerblade up and down my driveway playing this song over and over again.

every time i hear it, i'm back in pg county, dancing like a maniac in the living room and making up dance routines with my sister, kari.

those were the days.

day 28: a song i wish i could play

i love love love the accordion.

and in my wildest dreams, i can play this song with my eyes closed.

we used to wait.

i was first introduced to arcade fire in 2006 by my sister, kirsten.

she was showing me a slideshow she had made on her new computer and had "neighborhood #1 (tunnels)" playing in the background.

it was love at first note.

in 2007 they came to thanksgiving point in utah.

on a weekday.

the third week of fall semester.

i was stuck in stupid rexburg and i cried in my room while listening to an npr podcast of an arcade fire concert wishing i could be there.

kirsten, the good sister that she is, called me a few times so i could be there by phone and i thought that was the closest i would ever get to see them live.

and now, 3.5ish years later, i will get closer.

so close, in fact, that i will actually be in the same venue as them,

breathing the same air,

singing the same words.

on april 11th, 2011 magic will happen.

thanks to that same sweet sister who introduced me to the band, i will be seeing them LIVE right down the street from my parents' house and

I

CAN'T

WAIT

!

i can guarantee you that i will be the girl crying in the stands when they play this song.

FOURHUNDRED!

so, guess what!

this is my 400th post!

400 POSTS!

can you believe it?? i can hardly believe it myself!

it feels like i just posted my 300th post yesterday.

in honor of this post, i will now do 400 cartwheels in a row.

....

done!

[i don't think people in this library ever learned from their mothers that staring is rude...]

thanks for reading, dear friends and family.

----------------

in other news...

i've noticed a change in myself lately.

i haven't gotten a dramatic haircut or a nosejob or anything.

it's more of a feeling than an alteration in my appearance.

i realized the other day that i am perfectly content and happy with this phase of my life.

although there are some things i would love to change [my current location comes to mind], i am, for the most part, overjoyed to be a student/single/almost 24 years old.

i know now and realize how vital it is to learn to be happy in whatever stage of life you're in, no matter what you're going through or where you are.

i have a friend who constantly complains that she's still single. she's my age, yet she feels like she's an old maid already.

i can't count how many times i've told her to just forget about that and learn to be content with her life at this point because she'll never get another chance to relive her life.

i've told her time and time again that being married or having a boyfriend won't magically make her happy.

after all, how can you be happy if you're always pining away for the future?

i know that graduation and leaving rexburg FOREVER won't magically make me an infinitely happier person [although it will help].

i will always hate this place.

BUT, that doesn't mean i can't be happy while i'm here.

if you're unhappy right now, may i suggest that you

write down things you're grateful for!

do one thing each day that makes you happy!

do some service for someone else!

hug a tree!

hold a baby!

cook a delicious meal!

watch singin in the rain!

and be happy now.

day 27: a song i can play

this is one of two songs i have memorized [the other one is fur elise (i think everyone on earth has that song memorized)].

over christmas break, my sister and i played it and sang it and it was one of the funniest moments of my life.

just because.

day 26: a song that makes me laugh

this song, "loving you" by minnie riperton cracks me up every. single. time.

and it's not the lyrics,

or even the vocal stylings,

it's the fact that it was featured in the following hilarious scene of the movie megamind [which i highy recommend!].

tooooooo funny.

day 25: a song i want played at my funeral

i remember the first time i ever heard this hymn.

i was in high school in my old ward in spokane, and i was overcome with emotion.

i related to the lyrics and was filled with the love of my Savior.

i've heard it many times since then, the last time being at the dedication of the byui center. the combined choirs and orchestra performed this rendition and i held back the waterworks until the last verse. when the orchestra builds up and the strings kick in, something amazing happens. i can't quite put my finger on it, but a feeling of pure love enters my heart every single time i hear it.

ideally, i'd want the grand and glorious edition at my funeral, but i think it's more fitting to have a version like sufjan's simple and humble rendition.

[watch sufjan peform this song live by clicking here!]

highlights!

last week was pretty awesome.

-i was completely spoiled and received a beautiful print done by my sister-in-law, a valentine and mix cd from talia, a valentine and polaroid photo from my niece and nephews, and another valentine from my parents in the mail.

-me and my friend matt sang "roses" by outkast at karaoke night in front of about six people. near the end of the song, after singing the chorus for the third time, we cried out "everybody!" and pointed our mics toward the crowd only to hear complete silence on their end. it reminded me of this snl skit:

-after karaoke, matt and i reminisced with my old roommate, becca, who just got engaged. i miss winter of 2010. what a great semester! the people i met that semester have remained great friends and i'm so grateful i have them in my life.

-spicy pork burrito from the taco bus. INCREDIBLE.

-me and my friend katie try to hang out every thursday. this thursday was so fun! we didn't even really do anything super special. we just hung out at her house and talked. but it was so much fun and i love seeing her [and her cute little girl, madysen] every week!

-i got to see my friend aaron's band, corsair wolves, perform at sammys on friday night. it was such a great show. it's always more fun to go to shows when you know the people who are playing.

-i have the best friends in the world. i'm so grateful for justin and lyndee and nikki and katie. if they weren't here in rexburg with me, i would go crazy. i love how we can talk for hours and not run out of things to say. i love laughing with them [and at them--haha] and swapping funny stories. in short, i just love them. so much.

-true grit is at the cheap seats! i had to cover my eyes a few times, but MAN that movie was good! and the donuts me and lyndee snuck into the theater were DELICIOUS [got integrity, lyndee? haha].

-broulim's is selling the most delicious oranges for 38cents a pound. i bought five on friday and three of them are gone already.

-i have officially applied for graduation! the end is near!

-i had to read this talk for one of my classes and it was just what i needed.

here's hoping this week is as good [or better]!

day 24: two songs i want to play at my wedding

because i couldn't pick just one.

day 23: a song that i work out to

when it comes to working out, daft punk is the basically the only thing i listen to.

what's on your workout playlist?

day 22: a song i listen to whilst driving

hands down the BEST driving song ever [and not just because it has the word "car" in the title]!

i always have to keep an eye on the speedometer while listening, though, because i tend to speed a little...

if i'm not in the mood for arcade fire [hahahahaha that's funny], i usually just listen to a song i like to sing along with. i'm totally that person drumming on the steering wheel and singing at the top of my lungs in the car.

i fear for my future children.

what songs do you like to listen to in the car?

on a road trip?

do you prefer music or talk radio?