silver lining.

i constantly change my mind.
one day i'll have a grand idea and be super excited about it, and the next day i'll decide that i want something different.

but mark my words, this time i'm sticking to my plan.
this time, there's no going back.

i'm going to ecuador.

i can't even describe how good i feel about this decision.
lately i have been so stressed out with trying to decide what i'm going to do and where i'm going to go and this is the first time i've felt peace in weeks.
and since i've made this decision, things have fallen into place. even though i just made it a few hours ago, i just have this great excitement and zest for life.
even though i feel like a grandma sometimes, i am still young.
and there is still so much i want to do with my life.

i want to live in seattle, travel to scandinavia, go on a roadtrip across the country, graduate from school, start my career, live somewhere cool, meet all kinds of people, eat delicious food, learn how to cook/sew/decorate, and just live my life.

so, in order to accomplish these things, i have made a plan for the next year or so.

life plan:
april - mid-july = rexburg.
july - november = cuenca.
november - beginning of january = orem.
january - april = rexburg.
april/may - august = seattle/new york [nannying?].


there you have it.

i just have to say, i've done a complete 180.
i am so excited to experience everything that's coming up in my life.
and i feel completely happy for the first time in a long time.

there is hope.
there is always hope.