take, for instance, the time i was sitting at a desk writing a paper and the guy sitting behind me accidentally ran his fingers through my hair while leaning backwards to stretch his back.
or, the time my roommate and i were walking through the library past a few celebrity caricatures done by illustration students and she pointed out the one of jack black and called him my boyfriend right when a guy i had never seen before in my life walked the opposite way. he looked at us like we were insane and kept walking and that's when we realized that he thought my roommate had called him my boyfriend. we laughed about that one for about ten minutes.
but this experience i'm about to relate [at the behest of my dear sister, kirsten], might possibly take the cake.
one day, i went to broulims to get some essentials with my old roommate, tanya. i bought sticky-tac, address labels, and bundaberg ginger beer [i highly recommend it]. it was a beautiful, sunny day and i smiled the whole way home, thinking about the cold, frosty ginger beer i would consume with my pita and hummus sandwich i would have for dinner. when i got home, i stuck the 4-pack in my fridge and took a nap. i woke up a couple hours later and made my delicious sandwich, took my now-cold bottle of ginger beer out of the fridge, and turned on the tv to watch gilmore girls.
pure bliss.
however, that bliss was interrupted when a roommate of mine came home. after exchanging a few pleasantries, the confrontation began. here's how it went down:
her (looking very nervous and serious): kellie, i have a question to ask you.
me (feeling very nervous): uh, okay. shoot.
her: is that your beer in the fridge?
me: you mean ginger beer? yeah, it's mine.
her: well, me and our other roommates found it in the fridge and just assumed it was yours. we don't feel comfortable having alcohol in the house.
me (trying desperately not to laugh/scream): you know it's not really beer, right?
her: but it says beer on the bottle...
me: no, it says "non-alcoholic ginger beer" on the bottle. it's just like root beer or ginger ale.
her: oh! well, that's a relief! while you were napping, we knocked on your door so we could have a discussion about the word of wisdom with you. i'm glad it's not really alcohol.
me: uh, yeah. me too.
a few hours later, that roommate's friends came over. i stayed in my room with the door closed to keep myself from saying something to her i would [possibly] later regret. but through that closed door, i heard her tell each one of her friends to open up the fridge and look inside because there was something in there that would "freak them out".
each one of them did just that.
the moral of this story is: if you're going to snoop on other people, make sure you do your research [and maybe read the clearly-labeled bottle] before you make any snap judgments.
and hide your real beer in the mini-fridge in your room*.
*just in case the honor code police are reading this, i am 100% JOKING ABOUT THIS and DO NOT condone the hiding of alcohol in any way.
4 comments:
well yeah, you would def. want your alcohol out in the open. obviously. excuse me while i peel the label off my red wine vinegar.
oh, thank you.
um. i can't wait to get you outta there. rexburg scares me. i can't believe half the stuff you tell me (but i do).
and why would they feel it was their responsibility to have a WofW talk with you anyway? Who are these people???
next thing root beer will be outlawed. have they even seen root beer?
AARRRUGHHHH!!!!
hang in there, sister.
this is brilliant. i can totally see this happening. you will look back at these experiences and cherish them.
Hilarious!
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